Qoutes from Calvin

CALVIN-

"I feel like 'Dr. Zhivago'."
"Readyyy...Aimmm...."
"If there's more to life than this, I don't know what it is."
"Hewwo! Is Hobbesie-Wobbsie sweepy? Ooh, he's just a big snoogie-woogie isn't he? Yes he IS! Hewwo snoogie-woogy!"......*a few panels later*......"I can see why little tabby cats are much more popular."
"Hey dad, can I take the gas can for the lawn mower out in the back yard?" Note: Need I say more?
"Centipedes have poisoned pinchers?"
"Like it's MY fault she hasn't gotten the chimney swept."
"Life's disappointments are harder to take when you don't know swear words."
"Mom, can we go out to the highway?"
"...either this is my lucky day, or I missed the end-of-recess bell again."
"Oh No! I'm in coodie central! I haven't even had my shots! Air Filter! Air Filter!"
"If a plane comes along now I'm dead."
"There's no head rest on this chair! I should sue for whiplash!"
"Why should I have to work for everything?! It's like saying I don't deserve it!"
"I'm going to paste susie's pate with a slushball!
"It's psychosomatic. You need a labotomy! I'll get a saw."
"I'll get him for this if it takes my whole life."
"It's not the pace of life I mind. It's the sudden stop at the end."
"I try to make everyone's day a little more surreal."
"I don't need parents. All I need is a recording that says: 'Go play outside.'"
"Happiness is being famous for your financial ability to indulge in every kind of excess."
"You know how Einstein got bad grades as a kid? Well, mine are even worse!"
"A day can really slip by when you're deliberately avoiding what you're supposed to do."
"I'M SIGNIFICANT!...screamed the dust speck."
"My brain always rejects attitude transplants."
"Nothing spoils fun like finding out it builds character."
"It's hard to be religious when certain people are never incinerated by bolts of lightning."
"I hate it when I can't gird my loins with funny animals."
"I'm a simple man with complex tastes."
" A little rudeness and disrespect can elevate a meaningless interaction to a battle of wills and add drama to an otherwise dull day."
"The secret to happiness is short-term, stupid self-interest!"
"Trusting parents can be hazardous to your health."
"It's psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I'll get a saw."
"In my opinion, we don't devote nearly enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks."
"Susie, if you want to see your doll again, leave $100 in this envelope by the tree out front. Do not call the police. You cannot trace us. You cannot find us.Sincerely, Calvin."
"This clean, wholesome television! Ughh, it makes me sick."
"I think nighttime is dark so you can imagine your fears with less distraction."
"As far as I'm concerned, if something is so complicated that you can't explain it in 10 seconds, then it's probably not worth knowing anyway."

HOBBES-
"I think this is my favorite time of year! The new snow muffles approaching foorsteps! Hoo Hoo!"
"Will I'll be! MY fuzzy mittens HAVE pads!"
"A Philistine on the sidewalk."
"I'm lean! I'm mean! Tell ehr chocolate pudding makes my coat lustrious."
"Z"
"Hoo Hoo! That was a good one! Look how far we landed!"
"Quick! To the Bat-Fax!"
"I suppose we could try being GOOD."
"Your nose is probably all clogged up now, huh?"
"If you snore, I'm tilting the bed so you roll out the window."
"Is Amazon Girl's super power the ability to squeeze that figure into that suit?"
"The turbo is pooped."
"The score is 'Q' to '12'!"
"You're lucky tigers are so smart."
"Live and don't learn, that's us."
"The best presents don't come in boxes."
" I'll draw some stars to show pain and human suffering."
"I don't know which is worse, ...that everyone has his price, or that the price is always so low."
"So the secret to good self-esteem is to lower your expectations to the point where they're already met?"
"Did you ask your Mom if you could jump off the roof?"
On the topic of falling in love: " First, your heart falls into your stomach and splashes your innards. All the moisture makes you sweat profusely. This condensation shorts the circuits to your brain, and you get all woozy. When your brain burns out altogether, your mouth disengages and you babble like a cretin until she leaves."
" Van Gogh would've sold more than one painting if he'd put tigers in them."
" If you couldn't find any weirdness, maybe we'll just have to make some!"
"Most people don't sleep well next to a hungry tiger."
"No sport is less organized than Calvinball!"
"I think animals are alway so cute."
"There's more to this world than just people, you know."

SUSIE-
"He pounces on you?"
"I wish my parents would move. My diary is getting weirder every day."
"Forget it Calvin, I'm not playing with you anymore."
"Calvin, you are so weird I'm not even going to talk to you."
"I wish I lived someplace where I went to a normal bus stop."
"A PHOTO OF BINKY BETSY TIED TO A CHAIR!!"
"Uh oh, here come Calvin...the incurable weirdness poster child."
"What's the matter with YOU??"
"DROP DEAD, CALVIN."
"The thought of a jerk like you begging one of us for a date when you're 17."

MOE-
"Hey Calvin you're on my swing. Get lost."
"Next period you'll be so covered with mat burns you'll need skin grafs! Ha ha ha! See ya then, Twinky."
"Hey Calvin, it's gonna cost you 50 cents to be my friend today."
"Then the janitor scrapes you off the wall with a spatula."
"...uh..."
"What?"
"Hey, Twinky, want to see if there's an afterlife?"


SUMANTH-
"Hey you are a person with lots of time on your hand"

Uday's blogzz

Here's returning a favour..and don't believe what he says about me..

Uday's blogzz

Hair yesterday Gone Today

Yes that is what happenend to me..But I am loving all the double takes that are happening today..Still can picture the painful look on the barber's face when I asked him to trim my hair..but it still hurts that my effort of 6 months has gone down the barber's drain...

Chaitra's blog

Here is a blog which should brighten your day. She is a friend who shares my interest in C&H..maybe it is more like I share her interest as she is MUCH more keen than me on C&H..

Soch

Shivanasamudram

Went on a weekend drive to Shivanasamudram..long name ..hope I got the speling right. At least this is what most of the direction boards consistently said. Very unlike Hogganekal, where every district had their own variation of the spelling. Anyway, geting back to the drive... It was certainly one where I was a little apprehensive starting off.. We had forgotten to inform Arvind (Sorry man..still feeling guilty), and my fellow travellers would be 2 girls.. I would have to be careful about where we stopped and also keep an eye out for wayward characters. I was praying that we do not have any breakdowns with the vehicle, cause I would have to leave the 2 girls alone with the car and have to look for a mechanic..Luckily this did not happen... I was careful not to pass this apprehension onto the girls...However once we started off, the drive was getting enjoyable...Reshma was the owner of our transport-a maruti 800- and I was the substitute driver, but as it turned out I drove for nearly 80% of the distance.. Reshma,I guess surprised herself with her own driving.She was absolutely thrilled to be driving at speeds in excess of 80kmph..
The start was however delayed because I was not able to get up early. All thanks to my late night impulsive party the previous night..Went to reshma's house(and ironically she had been up early this day), and moved on to Chaitra's house.. I was pretty hungry by then, cause due to my night sojourn , i had missed dinner..At Chaitra's house her mom offered us breakfast and I jumped at the offer, fending off a few glares and rebukes from Reshma.
After this we set off , and the traffic on the way out of the city was downright pathetic.. The highway was such a pleasure after that. Discovered one definite advantage being born a man..the whole world is your loo..pity the girls for this though... The drive was uneventful other than our first stop where a couple of harmless guys tried to make some conversation with the girls..Didn't see them after that though..MAybe I scared them off...haha wishful thinking..
We made good speed to the falls and it was a really good iew. I would have enjoyed it even if not for all the liter there..It was such a putoffthe way people were littering.. The shopkeepers did not have any dustbin either. We carried our trash back with us, cause we did not want to add on to the defacing of this spot. We spent what seemed like a long time, just staring at the falls and admiring it.. It seemed to change shae every now and then....
After having our fill of the falls, we decide to we would head to Mysore to have lunch. We expected the ride to b not more than 2 hours but the bad roads made sure this stretched on fo r 3 hours...at times there was no road but just traces of a road, that should have been there..AT one point the main road continued on as a mud road and I took the oe that looked bigger. After about a Km, we luckily asked for directions and went back the right way...
Lunch at Mysore was a good one. After lunch we just got back in the car and headed home. And the less said about Mysore-Bangalore highway the better. We were all getting a little bored by now, and so I was making good speed.. The highlight was that the brake was behaving funny..It would work if it wanted and not work sometimes..Had to be very careful because of this...We also passed a funny man in a maruti..HE had a weird signal, which meant we could pass him when we honked behind him..It looked more like he was struggling for air or rowing a boat , than like a traffic signal...ust to catch this signal again I let him overtake me and honked to pass him...But, he did catch on the third time and there ended our highway entertainment.. Not much happenend after this except for a ford endevaour passing us like as if we were stationary, and hitting the city at peak traffic time...
Overall A good trip, and I would like to do this again soon sometime, and we definitely will inform Arvind and make sure he comes..CIAO

My Thunderbird

Riding my bike is getting to be pretty addictive to me. Riding in the traffic is still a pain, but all the stares at the signals you get makes it worth it though. I do not know how this got instilled in me, but it is pretty deep. Every time I travel somewhere, whatever vehicle I am in , I just can't help thinking of how this road would feel if I was on my bike. The experience of riding it is not easy to put in words. Riding the bike makes you feel like you are above the others on the road. As one fellow rider put it, while riding a bullet , you feel like you are surveying your kingdom. Don't think I can add anymore to this. It is better to be silent and thought a genius, than babble on and prove my foolishness.

Good from far but far from good

Today while walking from the parking lot to the office I saw a girl ahead, facing the other way. Watching her from a distance I was wondering how she looked , cause the view I had, looked good. I was picturing a gorgeous looking girl. To avoid leching I passed her without glancing. While passing her I heard a voice. "Excuse me", she said. I turned around and, was I surprised? It was a woman who must be at least 30 and, boy I would not be want to be stranded anywhere with her. Gave her the directions to some place she wanted to go to, and hurried back to avoid her calling me again. It a classic case of good from far but far from good or what???

Eureka

I can blog again..My system had crashed and I could not blog for a long time..Will update with details of a drive to Shivanasamudram soon....

Follicle folly

Today was going to be the day that i was gonna snip my looong hair.. Yes! it was indeed a sad day for me ..Making up my mind I set off to the saloon. The place is named "Well done". Is that being modest or what.. Today I was going to do this no matter what.. Since it was a monday and all normal folks were getting ready to set off to work, I had first choice of the seats there... Saw a mild mannered fellow and settled down in the chair that he was managing.. In a sad voice I told him to cut me hair to a sane length..
He took the pains to untangle my hair and combed it neatly and every strand was in place.. Ah how nice my hair looked. My resolve was getting weaker by the minute...I wanted to just jump off the seat and go home..I was beginning to feel vey depressed that all my effort at growing my hair so loong was gonna meet these scissors now.. I had to keep telling myself to just get through with it. It was getting more painful by the minute.. Wonder what the barber would have done if I had jumed off the chair and run home..
As I was putting myself through this torture he asked me if it was alright to trim it just half an inch or would I want more...You bet buddy I am not letting this chance go ..I told him to cut as little as possible..The pooor fellow started snipping slowly, like he would hurt my hair if he cut any faster. Guess he was making it loook worth the 20 bucks I was giving him... Man was I happy. It must have been some divine intervention that saved the day for my hair...Was I thankful for this or what.. My next experiment with my hair is gonna be after a month..hopefullly then I go through with it..or maybe not..

Stall-tisctics

Spare a thought for these statistics:

1) Almost 100% of divorced people started out as married.
2) 48% of all married people have been proven to be males.
3) 67.45% of statistics are made on the spot.
4) 87.46% of people living in amazon like to have a shave every thursday.
5) 36% of those below the age of 100 are heavy drinkers.
6) 76% of all married men are bald
7) 18% of all maried women are bald

100% of this post is sheer nonsense...

RE-Search

Isn't it funny that what scientists do is called research. Where exactly did they lose it that they have to research it?? and nowadays they are not so bright with their researches either.
Imagine some researches like the following:
1) It has been found that all dogs that have light coloured noses have more tendencies to howl at the moon.
2)Giraffes with looong necks have trouble winking at their partners during the month of june
3) Elephants never drink water when there are more than 8 elephants at the same watering hole knee deep in water.
4) When two squirrels are in love, they go colour blind.

And moving on to humans.

5) People living in the dep jungles of Amazon have no knowledge of how people in Taiwan look.
6) Men who have large tattoos on their chests do not like to wear shirts..
7) Americans when subjected to terror start to consume more eatables and sue the system for higher amounts for the resulting obesity.
8) Possessing or not possessing WMD's is harmful to your country if the world's big daddy is presently being ruled by some guy whose brain is still boarding its train of thought..
9) The intelligence of a countrys' head is indirectly propotional to its economic strength..


That's all for now folks..More updates as researches conclude. At present there are still research teams that have headed out into the deep jungles of amazonand other places where information is waiting to be unearthed. One intersting research on the anvil is whether drinking causes pregnancy..or the other way round and how this impacts the third world countries in their daily lives..

One-Liners

I am absolutely in love with witty one-liners. They are just the bright spots of my day. They are something I use to to keep my spirts high on damp days..speaking of spirits,its saturday night and I really do mis my spirits today..Oh well ,thee's always next week. Hey I am digressing here...Back to the point, here are some one-liners. Imagine if some jobless researchers come up with studies for such stuff and then, I guess they would label it as maybe....monolinotherapy and some of those jerks wou;d then maybe come up with monolinophobia..man that'll be the day.. Here are some anyway.

I Love animals. They taste great.

I say no to drugs They just don't listen.

A friend in need Is a pest indeed.

Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce.

Work is fine if itdoesn't take too much of your time.

When everything comes in your way you're in the wrong lane.

The light at the end of the tunnel may be an incoming train.
Born free taxed to death.

Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don'thave film.

Life is unsure, always eat your desert first.

Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.

If you keep your feet firmly on the ground,you'll have trouble putting on your pants.

It's not hard to meet expenses, they are everywhere.

I love being a writer...what I can't stand is the paperwork.

A printer consists of 3main parts:the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking redlight.

The hardest part of skating is the ice.

My phone number is 17.We got one of the earlyones.

The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. Theguy who invented theother three,he was the genius.

The trouble with being punctualis that no one is there to appreciate it.

In a country of free speech,why are there phonebills ?

If you tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe, he"ll believe you.But if you tell him a park bench has just been painted, he has to touch it to be sure.

I had a friend once.Then the rope broke and he got away.

If you cannot change your mind,are you sure you have one ?

Beat the 5 O'clock rush,leave work at noon !

If you can't convince them,confuse them.

It's not the fall that kills you.It's the sudden stop at the end.

I couldn't repair your brakes,so I made your horn louder.

Give a man a free hand,and he"ll run it all over you

Hot glass looks same as cold glass.- Cunino's Law of BurntFingers

Never underestimate the power of very stupid people in large groups.

The cigarette does the smoking you are just the sucker.

Someday is not a day of the week


You have now been nominated for the award of "bravery in the face of boredom" for reading this until the end. May you still continue exploring where other mere mortals do not venture.

Hoobastank----> The Reason

Absolutely love this song. Maybe because I can identify with what' sbeing said here...


I'm not a perfect person
As many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
Thats why i need you to hear

I've found a resaon for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is You [x4]

I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be

A reason to start over new
and the reason is you
I've found a reason
to showA side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you

Saturday night

Last Saturday night we had the "bright " idea of going to " THE CLUB". At the time it was a exciting idea. If only we knew what we had in store for us...
We are not the splurging types, but reached there and were just left gasping at the entry fee.
As if that was not enough the booze cost us the heavan and earth.
Our first hour passed by whining away at the prices and generally bitching about the place.
The people there are so dim witted and we thought it was a cool place..Oh boy was I wrong or was I wrong...
I don't think I will ever get adjusted to the lifestyle that those people there belonged to..I hope i don't . I like me as I am just fine...
NEVER AGAIN are we guys gonna visit that money pit..
To top this the place was filled with girls clinging onto guys like as if they would fall off the earth if they let go. And through the night they kept looking for stronger clinging places I guess, what with the same girls clinging to different guys at different points(pun intended).
The best part of the night( or morning by now) was the ride back home. We had 2 bikes( Thunderbird's) and were doing speeds of 110 at times. It was a cool experience. And stopping to drink tea on MG road at 5:00 in the morning was cool or what??

Lovely poem

Chaitra mailed me this poem today and I thought it deserved a mention here

I was thinking of old friends today
And how many of them have slipped away.
Moved, got married, or stopped calling so much,
Found new friends, got busy, and just lost touch.
It reminded me of falling leaves.
Every autumn the leaves fall from the trees.
Some stay longer than others, but eventually -
Each leaf must fall, I'm told,
Leaving the tree alone to face the cold.
Why is it that in the time of utmost need
The leaves would seek to leave the tree?
And when we need our friends around
We look and they cannot be found?
Of course these friendships come and go
And in the spring new leaves will grow.
But I prefer autumn friends of old
With crackling laughter and colors bold.
It saddens me now I must admit
How somehow, someway, I did forget
Laughing with old friends of mine
During summers when the sun would shine.
And then I thought of you.
That one stubborn leaf that won't let go.
That clings despite the winds that blow.
Fighting ice, and snow, and winter's stings
Hanging on right through till spring.
So I guess that's what you are to me -
The very last leaf to leave the tree.
I know it seems silly, but it's true.
When I see that last leaf...
...I think of u